If you know of people who always feel worthless, insufficient, and are lacking in self-esteem, then there is a strong possibility that the person has Avoidant Personality Disorder, a mental and psychological disorder wherein the person has low self-confidence, oftentimes lonely, isolated, reluctant to changes, and is oversensitive. Usually, these people are incapable of having social relations with others because they view constructive criticisms as rejection and source of embarrassment for them. Likewise, they do not make any efforts to maintain interpersonal relationships for fear of being ridiculed.
Avoidants, as people suffering from this disorder are called, usually assess prospective friends or mates prior to establishing close relationships with them. If they see and feel that their prospects are capable of accepting them as they are – in other words, unconditionally, then they would slowly open themselves up to others. Because of this low self-esteem, there is always a need for them to hear that they are loved, needed, and desired.
What Avoidants do not know is the characteristics that they have, the mannerisms, and their very own fears are the main reasons why people mock and scoff at them. Their own fears backfire at them.
Their low levels of self-confidence make them doubt their own capabilities and beauty – such that their self-image is next to non-existence. What’s more, when people honestly praise them for what they have achieved, Avoidants would think that the other person is just trying to manipulate and ridicule them.
One thing about Avoidants is they have a tendency to over-fantasize. They have this vision of themselves outshining everyone else and winning over all obstacles, grandeur ideals about how a perfect relationship should be. However, problem is, they cannot translate these fantasies into reality because of how they really perceive themselves as.
When in public, they would tend to avoid crowds and would rather keep to themselves. When asked about their achievements or complimented on their talents, they clam up and would attempt to downplay their contributions and become exaggeratedly reserved. Their reason for doing so is to thwart any attempts by co-workers, family, or friends to criticize them.
This disorder is often associated with mood and other anxiety-related disorders. When left untreated, this disorder may lead to extreme cases of paranoia and other mental disturbances.