OK students, welcome to Dogs 101. Class is in session, take out your note pads and pens and get ready to take notes. And no falling asleep in the back either, I am watching you! Can any of my wonderful pupils give me an answer to the question, "ways to pick up dog poo?" Yes it is a crappy question, but one that needs to be answered. "With a plastic dog bag" you say? Yes that is one way, Interesting fact about the plastic bag, did you know that by using a plastic bag to clean up your dog poo poo, you are also causing harmful bacteria to come in contact with both humans and our landfills by improperly disposing of the dogs feces in an ordinary trash can. And by the way, did you know it takes on average 1000 years for a plastic bag to degrade on its own?
Well actually the bag photo degrades meaning that the ultra violet rays of the sun cause the bag to break up and fragment into pieces. These pieces then are blown into the trees and our oceans and waterways where marine life and the birds can mistake them for food causing the animals to choke on them. Approximately 100,000 whales, turtles, penguins, and birds die each year due to plastic bags. That question will be asked as a bonus on your quiz by the way. Alright young lady, do you have an answer on a way to pick up your dogs poop? A pooper scooper you say, great answer. More convenient than a dog bag for sure. Yes, the dog poop scoop can be an alternative. This is a long handled device that scoops up the dog business without you ever having to come in contact with it. Again we have to bring up harmful, very dangerous bacteria by disposing of the dog poo poo in an ordinary receptacle. Escherichia coli for example! And that is nothing to scoff at, because E Coli can cause kidney damage and other health related issues. Come on class more answers on ways to clean up after dog? Cutting the grass? Yes that is another way. Anyone else? Hire someone eh? Another good answer. Oh students, I am proud of you and your participation in this lecture, you did do your homework. Did anyone bring the teacher an apple by the way?
Dog poop is a very serious problem. And it is not, I repeat not a lawn fertilizer like so many think. Your pet's feces is actually toxic to your grass. And dog waste contains fecal coliform bacteria, which is known to cause cramps, diarrhea, intestinal illness, and serious kidney disorders in human animals.
I see time is running short in class here, so we will get more into the toxicity of dog poo and how it relates to you individually next time. Take this knowledge that you now know and put it to good use.