Do You Hide When You Have a Cold Sore?

A cold sore on the lip can make you extremely self-conscious and as a therapist I find that people tell me how they've called in sick to work, skipped classes or canceled meetings to avoid people seeing the lip cold sore. I do not think this is a healthy thing to do because it is a natural response to the situation. One feels helpless, judged by others and that they stick out.

Perspective is important. Everyone gets pimples, bad hair days and other cosmetic moments that are embarrassing. Let people see that you are bigger than the sore on your lip and that you will not let it dominate your day. You are much more than that. If you are expected to have a presentation at work, go ahead and give it. You will be showing your inner strength and character. People see when someone can ignore a physical problem and actually feel respect for them. It also helps you cultivate the capacity to transcend pain and itching when you do not give in to the urge to hide out.

If you are a student, you can feel that everyone is watching at you. Remember that most people are in their own worlds, thinking about whether or not someone likes them, if they can complete the homework assignment or why someone was mean to them. People tend to be a bit ego oriented and do not notice every imperfection in others. Of course, if your friends are critical and mocking then you need to evaluate if they are good for you and if the relationships are healthy. Sometimes making fun of yourself a bit can also cut through the whole situation. I had a client with a big cold sore on her lip tell me that she was very embarrassed for two days but then just let go and was incredibly relaxed around her friends. She actually found herself making jokes and being funnier than she had been in months. When we let go of things we become light and people like to be around us.

Of course, it's important to find ways to reduce the cold sores and treat them so that your immune system holds strong and you also will not spread the virus. But do not hide out. Instead let people see your personality inside and get to know the inner you.

So You Are a Diabetic

If you have just been recently diagnosed, then there is much to learn. Be careful where you get your information. The doctor should be your first source. Your doctor should prepare you with literature and other teaching material, as well as give you referrals to help groups. Being a diabetic does not mean your life is going to change. It does mean that you will have to make important decisions about your health maintenance. If your diagnoses requires that you take oral hypoglycemics then you need to know how they work, when to take them, and the signs and symptoms of hypoglycemia and hyperglycemia. For those who are required to take injections of insulin, they must learn how to give them injections, and take their blood glucose level. The best idea is to take it slow. All of this information may seem overwhelming at the beginning. No one expects you to know everything. Most of all be patient with yourself.

It is important to understand why you have diabetes. Diabetes whether Type I or Type II has been determined to have certain genetic links. Genetically speaking, Type I Diabetes risk to offspring from the mother is 1% -3%, risk to offspring of diabetic fathers is 4% -6%, with identical twin concordance between 30% -50%. (1) In regards to Type II Diabetes the genetic predisposition of risk to first degree relatives is 10% -15% and identical twin concordance can exceeded 90%. (1)

In Type I Diabetes the autoimmune system of the individual gradually destroy the beta cells within the pancreas. Signs and symptoms of diabetes do not begin to manifest until 80% -90% of the beta cells are destroyed. Beta cells are important because they are responsible for the production of insulin. Insulin is a hormone that controls the amount of glucose in the blood stream at any particular time. For instance, when a person indulges in a meal that is high in sugar content, there will be large amounts ofo circulating glucose in the blood. To protect the body from excessive amounts of glucose, there is cascade of hormonal signals that stimulate the pancreas to produce insulin and put the unused glucose back into the cell where it will stay until the body requires it. High glucose levels can put the person in danger of diabetic ketoacidosis. Excessively low levels of blood glucose can be just as dangerous as in hypoglycemia. The acceptable range of blood glucose levels considered optimum range between 90-120 mg / dl. The diagnoses of diabetes require blood tests for confirmation. Usually one of the following blood tests are done;

1. Fasting Plasma glucose level exceeding 126 mg / dl

2. Random, or temporary, plasma glucose exclusion 200mg / dl, with the inclusion of the signs and symptoms of Type I Diabetes.

3. Two hour Oral Glucose Tolerance Test level exceeding 200mg / dl using a glucose load of 75mg.

Type II Diabetes is by far the most prevalent in those people diagnosed with diabetes. Also, certain populations have a predisposition to diabetes more so than others. Native Americans, Hispanics and African Americans appear to have higher rates of Type II diabetes than those non-Hispanic white counterparts.

The signs and symptoms of diabetes can differ depending on whether the person is Type I or Type II. For Type I diabetics, the symptoms include, polyuria (frequent urination), polydipsia (excessive thirst), and polyphagia (excessive hunger) as well as weight loss, weakness and fatigue. The signs and symptoms of Type II Diabetes are not as obvious as Type I. In Type II Diabetics, the sunset is later in life. Also, their pancreas is still producing some endogenous insulin. Therefore, their symptoms are not as detectable. Symptoms include, delayed wound healing, peripheral neuropathy (decreased sensation or pain in extremities), fatigue and visual changes. or Diabetes, just like hypertension is a disease that must be treated for life. Diabetics who take proper care of themselves can live long healthy lives into their nineties.



2. Lewis, Heitkemper, Dirksen, Medical surgical Nursing 6th ed., Mosby, copyright 2004, pg. 1270-1273.

Male Sexual Dysfunction and Obesity

Lots of people are overweight and we know that being overweight is unhealthy. Most people also find obesity unattractive, especially in sexual partners. Recent research has also shown that obesity is also linked to erectile dysfunction and infertility.

In an Australian study of 675 men between the ages of 45 to 60, it was found that erectile dysfunction was consistently related to obesity. This was even after factors such as age and the obesity related declination in testosterone were taken into consideration. One study is not definite, but other studies have shown similar results.

In a study in Brazil, researchers studied men over 60 and also found a strong correlation between obesity and erectile dysfunction. A Harvard study showed that men with a 42 inch waist were nearly 50% more likely to have problems than men with 32 inch waists. An Italian study showed that obese men with erectile problems could reduce their problems by losing weight.

We also know that obesity is related to low fertility in men and studies have shown that this is true in youngger men as well.

It seems that obesity is worse than originally thought and strongly correlated with many medical issues, not just heart disease, hypertension, diabetes and stroke. Men, if having sexual performance or fertility issues, try losing weight. And even if you do not have those issues, if you're fat, you are much better off in the long run if you trim down, so do some exercise and eat well to prevent future problems.

Old School Way To Get Bar-Bending Strength

If you compare old time bodybuilders versus the modern bodybuilders of today, you can not help but notice that the old time guys look different.

Modern bodybuilders of today are huge – no doubt about that. But their muscles look soft and bloated. While the bodybuilders of yesterday had that rugged, hard look.

In this article, I'll tell you how to get that old school rugged look of power.

So why do modern bodybuilders look different from old school bodybuilders?

Well, the training styles and methods have changed dramatically over the years. Decades ago, the old-time trainers wanted to be STRONG as well as big. Because most contests consist of both powerlifting (lifting as much as you can for one rep) as well as physiological judging.

So you had to do more than just look good to nab the trophy. You had to be strong too.

But modern bodybuilders are far more concerned with size and appearance. So they do not have the same rugged look as the old-school trainers.

In this article, I will explain how you can get rugged, bar-bending strength by training in any old-fashioned way.

Check it out:

Because the old-timer trainers worked for STRENGTH as well as size, they often did heavy singles and partial reps.

A single is the most weight you can handle for one rep. A partial means using even more weight than your best single, but shortening the range of motion so you do not have to move the bar as far.

Heavy singles and parts help build the rugged look because the extra weight strengnthes not only your muscles, but also your joints, ligaments and tendons as well.

As an added bonus, heavy singles and partial help train your nervous system. In other words, if you do a half squat with 450 pounds, suddenly a full squat with 400 pounds will feel lighter and you will be able to get more reps.

But do not take my word for it.

I want you to experience this for yourself.

So here is my 30 day challenge for you.

Do not change anything about your workout. But on the last workout of the week, I want you to pick one exercise and try some heavy singles and parts after your work sets are done.

So for example, if your last workout is Friday and you are doing squats, bench presses and chin-ups here is what you do.

Pick one exercise – say squats. After your work sets are done, instead of unloading the bar I want you to add MORE weight to the bar and go for a single.

So if you typically do 3 sets of 5 reps with 315 pounds, that is what you will do. Then add 20 lbs to the bar and shoot for 1 rep. If you did it easily, add another 20 pounds to the bar and try again. Keep going until you find your true 1 rep max – the most weight you can do for one rep.

Then, keep adding weight to bar – another 10-20 pounds. But you are going to shorten your motion and only go for a half-squat. If you made it easily, add some more weight to the bar and shorten your motion even more – this time only go for a quarter squat.

Finally, if you are up for it, add even more weight to the bar and this time just un-rack the bar and hold it on your back for 10-20 seconds.

After all is said and done, this will only add 10 minutes to your workout length. But these heavy single and parts will build tremendous power and help to build that old-school rugged look of power.

Remember, you only do this for one exercise on your final training day of the week. If you choose squats in one week, then only do heavy singles and parts on your bench press for week two and then switch things up and do heavy singles and parts with chin-ups on week 3.

Here is a quick summary:

# 1) On the last training day of your week, pick one exercise and perform heavy singles and partial reps AFTER your normal work sets.

# 2) Choose a different exercise each week and do not perform heavy singles and parts for the same exercise two weeks in a row.

# 3) Try this for 30 days and you will be amazed at how quickly your strength and size improves.

Prevent Poison Ivy Rash – Stop the Itching Before it Starts

Since the only way to truly get rid of poison ivy is by waiting it out, the best plan for dealing with PI is prevention. Once the rash-causing urushiol oil attaches to your skin, it is exceptionally difficult to remove.

Additionally, since you can not see the oil, it is easy to spread it around, making it possible to recontaminate yourself many days or even weeks later! In fact, this contributions to the myth that you can catch poison ivy from others, or that it spreads by itching.

The truth is a bit more subtle – think of it like wet paint. If you have it on your hands, you can spread it to other people, or onto a door knob. Others can then touch the door knob and get it on themselves! Or you can touch the door knob after you cleaned your hands, and now you have it on you again! Scratch that itchy stomach now, and you have it in your belly button!

If all the paint is dry or cleaned up, then it will not spread anymore – even if you can see where the paint once was. Ie, just because there is rash it does not mean you have any more urushiol oil to spread around. But unlike paint, urushiol oil does not just dry out. In fact it can hang around and cause rash years after coming off the plant.

Use these tips to prevent getting a rash to begin with!

  • Learn what poison ivy looks like! There are many similar plants, but once you know what to look for it's easy to spot the bad guys.
  • Cover your skin. If you are hiking through the woods, or even just trimming tall grass and weeds around your property, wear long pants and long sleeves. If you want to be extra careful, tuck your pant legs into your socks (this will keep out the ticks, too!)
  • Use a preventative lotion When you go head-to-head with poison ivy, either walking through a field of it or trying to remove the vines from inside your shrubs, apply a lotion like Ivy Block or another similar product first (usually at least 15 minutes before contact, but read the directions on the bottle of course!) These kinds of creams work by soaking into the skin and forming a temporary barrier that keeps the urushiol from attaching to you.
  • Beware – the oils may still transfer from you to other surfaces, and then back to you long after the blocking lotions have been washed off! Which brings us to the last and most important point:
  • Wash, wash, wash! Use lots of cool, soapy water as soon as you can if you think you've touched the plant in any way. Make sure you use soap! The rash causing agent, urushiol, is indeed an oil. It comes in small quantities so your skin probably will not feel oily, but it is! Water without soap will spread it. So, use soap – the stronger the better.
  • Remember to remove your rings or other jewelry before you wash. If you get some of the oils underneath, you will not be able to fully clean it!

Once you have finished cleaning yourself, you still are not done. If you want to truly make sure you will not get the rash, you need to retrace your steps. Find any door knob, tool, hose, counter top, faucet, or light switch you may have touched before you managed to get clean.

Use rubbing alcohol and a disposable rag to wipe down all the surfaces you can. Be as thorough as you can! Since urushiol can last for years without breaking down, you could quite easily come into contact with the oils months later and get poison ivy in the middle of the winter **

* I have first hand experience with this! Forgot to take off my wedding band, and the oil was rubbed into my finger over the course of a few days. When the rash appeared, I could not get my ring off!
** I did this too ..

How to Obtain Ageless Radiant Skin, Hair, and Nails

For most women their skin, hair and nails are very important. If these areas are healthy it gives a women youthful radiant appearance. Many people seem to think that skin maintenance starts on the surface when in actuality it starts within. To maintain flawless beautiful skin, you must develop a few regular habits that are not too difficult to follow. Create a routine that fits your daily schedule. Here's the daily routine I follow, feel free to use it or create your own:

– Drink plenty of water.
– Stay positive and smiling is good for the soul.
– Get enough rest.
– Eat healthy mainly raw fruits and vegetables.
– Exercise daily.
– Use some natural skin care products, these can be found at companies like Mary Kay, Avon, and Xtend-Life.

Try to use luke warm water or even cold water to cleanse your face. Hot water can damage the skin and create un-wanted wrinkles. Get a good natural moisturizer, wrinkle creams, and other anti aging creams and skin products. A good moisturizers can provide vitamin C and E, soy, protein and minerals.

Finding the right anti-aging, anti-wrinkling, will provide firming for eyes, neck, face, and body, removing stretch marks and scars, eliminating toenail fungus, acne and spider veins. Use homemade skin care whitening products like sandal wood powder, lemon juice, tomato juice, cucumber juice, milk cream, turmeric powder, gram flour, dry orange peel and rose water.

Give these remedies a try and find what works best for you.

Understanding Skin Anatomy

The skin is a vital organ covering the entire outside of the body thereby protecting it against heat, light, injury, and infection. It is the body’s largest organ. It is only about 2 millimeters thick and weighs approximately 6 pounds.

The skin is composed of two layers that cover a third fatty layer.


The epidermis is the outermost layer of the skin and is responsible for protecting the body from the environment. Its thickness varies on different parts of the body. For instance, it is only .05 millimeters thick on the eyelids and is 1.5 millimeters thick on the palms and the soles of the feet.

The epidermis is made up of five sublayers that work together to continually rebuild the skin’s surface.

The innermost layer of the epidermis is the basal layer. The cells in this layer continually divide, producing new cells that constantly push older ones up to the surface of the skin, where they are eventually shed. This layer also contains the cells that are responsible for our skin’s pigments, called melanin. Patches of melanin cause birthmarks, freckles, and age spots.

The squamous cell layer is above the basal layer and is the thickest layer of the epidermis. This layer contains the basal cells that have been pushed upward. These cells are now called squamous cells and produce the tough, protective protein that makes up the majority of the skin’s structure.

As the cells from the squamous layer are pushed up even further, through two more thin epidermal layers, they get bigger, flatter, and adhere together. Eventually they become dehydrated, die, and continue to migrate to the surface of the skin.

The outermost layer of the epidermis is called the stratum corneum. It is made up of 10 to 30 thin layers of continually shedding dead skin cells. This shedding process, where worn down cells are replaced by new layers of long-wearing ones slows down with age. Cell turnover takes 28 to 30 days to occur in young adults but requires 45 to 50 days in older individuals.


Located beneath the epidermis is the thickest of the three layers of the skin, the dermis. Much of the body’s water supply is stored here. It contains most of the skin’s specialized structures including, but not limited to:

* Blood vessels – to supply the epidermis with nutrient-saturated blood.

* Sebaceous glands – that secrete oil that helps keep the skin smooth and supple.

* Collagen – is the protein that holds the dermis together and is made by cells called fibroblasts. In the skin, collagen supports the epidermis, giving it its durability.

* Elastin – is a protein similar to collagen that allow the skin to snap back into place when stretched giving it its elasticity.


The subcutis, or hypodermis, is the innermost layer of the skin and consists of fat and collagen cells. Its thickness varies throughout the body and from person to person.

The above information should help you to assess anti-aging product ingredients and the aging skin issues they address.

Setting Up Your Office For "Health"

If you work and are spending one third to one half of your day in an office setting then your surroundings there are as important as those in your home. Although we usually have little control over the buildings we work in, being aware of problems that can affect us will enable us to take counter-measures and may encourage the creation of stimulating and nurturing environments. Below are 10 steps that will help to provide an office that is balanced and conducive to good health and well-being, which will ultimately benefit your health and the health your company.

1) Ergonomically Correct Chair: Make sure that your chair is comfortable and has adjustable height and arms. When you are sitting straight with feet flat on the floor your arms should be at a 90-degree angle when typing on the computer. If you are having to strain or stretch to reach your computer then you are putting stress on the back and shoulder area. Chairs can certainly be expensive but in the long run it will cost much less than spending time at the chiropractor.

2) Green Plants: Plants do more than just enhance the beauty of your surroundings, many actually clean pollutants out of the air as they add oxygen and humidity to the indoor environment. New findings suggest, however, that they may add more than just color and interest. They also filter the air, and can fight against the common high-tech ill, sick building disease. Recent research undertaken by the NASA Space Administration in America has yielded some very interesting results. In a test lasting two years conducted by Dr. B.C. Wolverton at the Stennis Space Centre in Mississippi it was discovered that common houseplants are capable of converting chemical air pollutants into harmless substances. Ivy, one of the smallest of houseplants, does an excellent job of cleaning the air of toxins, especially benzene and TCE. The humble potted Chrysanthemum is another goodie. You can place a number of plants around your office or make up a high scoring clean-air cocktail by adding such plants as Peace Lilies and Parlour Palms. Better still are various forms of Dracaena, Dracaena Warnecki and Dracaena Janet Craig are real pollutant sucking types. Chinese Evergreen and the humble Philoderdron are also two to watch out for.

3) Lighting: Studies suggest that natural light increases human productivity and reduces fatigue and stress. By simply replacing your antiquated fluorescent tubes with full-spectrum tubes, you can instantly enhance your environment and your well-being! Full spectrum lighting emits a natural, balanced spectrum of light that is the closest you can get to sunlight indoors. Based on years of study not only do they bring out true, vibrant colors but they can also ease eye fatigue, improve your mood, reduce cortisol (stress hormone) levels, slow aging of the retina and reduce glare.

4) Aromatherapy: Aromatherapy is the practice of using volatile plant oils, including essential oils, for psychological and physical well-being. Not only does the aroma of the natural essential oil stimulate the brain to trigger a reaction, but the natural constituents (naturally occurring chemicals) of the essential oil are drawn into the lungs and can also supply physical benefit. Aromatherapy can help with a physical condition, can help with symptoms, can affect your mood, or help alleviate or temporarily eliminate stress or other psychological factors. Scenting your office with Lavender essential oil is said to reduce computer errors at least 25%. The following is a good blend to use in the office (must have an aromatherapy diffuser): 2 drops of lemon, orange or bergamot; 2 drops of grapefruit; 1 drop ylang ylang, rose or neroli. Multiply your blend by 4 to obtain a total of 20 drops of your chosen blend. Add your oils to a dark colored glass bottle and mix well by rolling the bottle in between your hands. Add the appropriate number of drops from your created blend to your diffuser by following the manufacturer’s instructions. There are also many “recipes” on the Internet to use during the cold and flu season when “office-air” can be extremely contagious.

5) Air Quality: The EPA informs us that 6 out of 10 buildings are “sick” and that indoor air quality is the United States’ number one environmental health problem. A recent study by the U.S. Dept. of Agriculture found that ionizing a room led to 52% less dust in the air, and 95% less bacteria in the air (since many of the pollutants found in the air reside on floating dust particles). The U.S.D.A. also performed another study to test the effectiveness of negative ionization at removing airborne Salmonella Enteritidis. The negative ions drastically reduced the airborne salmonella particles, prompting the following statement from the USDA. I recommend a negative ion air purifier for the office setting. These units are small enough to fit on a credenza or desk and are very modestly priced.

6) EMF Protection: Detrimental energies from electromagnetic fields emitted from high tension wires, industrial radar, microwave beams, electric current, computers, cell phones, televisions, fluorescent lights and other electrical appliances have been found to be dangerous to mental and physical health. When an individual sleeps or works for extensive periods within electromagnetic frequency zones, these energies create a constant source of stress (altering body polarity) which can lead to fatigue, frustration, tension and illness. Signs of exposure may include drowsiness, chronic aches and pains, sleep disorders, irritability, low energy and general malaise and may lead to more serious health situations such as cancer. These highly disruptive energy fields actually numb or dull our sense perceptions and adversely impacts brain wave activity. Studies have also shown electromagnetic fields (EMF) to induce mild depression in many subjects with the disruption of melatonin, dopamine, and serotonin levels. There are many devices that can be used in the office or put on the computer that will give EMF protection. I recommend the Safe Space II. It is designed to neutralize harmful electromagnetic fields, geopathic disturbances, as well as other detrimental vibrational energies in environments. It is a framed holographic grid (encased behind glass) 2″ x 2″ and can be attached to any surface…especially the computer monitor. The Safe Space II device clears a spherical area with a 9′ radius. You can read more about it at

7) Colors: Color therapy has its roots in ancient Egypt. Scientific studies recognize that colors bring about emotional reactions to individuals. Our reactions and attitudes to colors differ from person to person. That color affects us all is an undoubted fact. Its significance has been investigated and the results utilized in merchandizing, selling, home decorating, the workplace environment, industry, plant growth, nutrition, physics, physiology, psychology, ecclesiasticism and art. In fact, color is so much a part of our lives that we tend to take it for granted. Colors that are useful in the office are: orange – stimulates creativity; yellow – intensifies the intellect and heightens motivation; red – energizes; blue – calming, fights physical and mental tension; green – fights irritability and has a healing effect on the body. For the office, use colors that you are drawn to as these are the colors that will benefit your health.

8) Music: Just about all offices have some type of music playing in the background. Music can affect emotional well-being, physical health, social functioning, communication abilities, and cognitive skills. Music in the workplace, either from piped-in music or from a radio, is sometimes used to mask sounds. Music can provide mental stimulation while performing monotonous tasks, which can help to reduce stress levels in the office. Some people, however, find music in the office intensely annoying, especially if it is too loud or inappropriate. I have found that soft, up-lifting music is very essential to the office “atmosphere”. There is literally a mirage of good background music available on CD’s. Search out the Internet on what is right for your office.

9) Breaks: Even the most focused person needs a break at least twice a day. Change of scenery also helps with emotions. One of the best ways to eliminate stress and recharge the body is to go outside for a ten-minute walk. Focus on your surroundings and take deep breaths. This will give you a renewal of energy and will also aid in Vitamin D production. Walk by yourself and focus on clearing your mind. Walking will also get the blood and the lymphatic system flowing.

10) Organization: It is an excellent idea to look into Feng Shui for the office. Feng Shui is basically an environmental science and gives advice on how to create environments in which we feel comfortable and supported. For example, water energy plays a significant role in Feng Shui. Having a small fountain in your office can give a sense of calmness and peacefulness. Keep your office clean and organized. There is no excuse for clutter. Make sure that your desk is clean and that everything is put away before you leave each day. A well-organized, uncluttered desk leads to clear thinking and reduces stress. Make a habit of putting items back in their original place after you are finished using them.

Putting in the extra time, effort and money in getting your office environment “healthy” will pay-off with a multitude of health benefits. Of course, it is assumed that when you are out of the office, you are also taking care of yourself by eating a healthy diet, exercising the body and mind, taking good supplementation and getting adequate rest. All of this goes hand-in-hand in getting and keeping the body healthy. Remember to address your attitude as you travel the path to good health, as negative attitudes are self-destructive. Good health requires desire, determination and discipline in every aspect of your life.

Dan Kennedy's Depression-Proofing Secret

LaTely, I've been thinking a lot about the LAST recession.

It was the 2002 fiasco that followed 9/11, and I had just subscribed to Dan Kennedy's "NO BS Marketing Newsletter" at the time. And in my first issue, I learned something that changed my entire life.

In fact, this particular lesson has been my constant companion. A "friend" that's guided me through some pretty scary times. And has kept me out of a LOT of trouble.

Anyway, what was the lesson?

The life-or-death importance of having the ability to produce .

The idea is that, if you cultivate your ability to produce, you will never have to worry about money. Never have lasting financial anxieties. And that you will, in fact, be part of a VERY small group who makes things happen – even if you have to drag the rest of the economy along with you to success.

It was (and still is) extremely inspiring to think about it.

And it was then when I really got SERIOUS about learning to sell.

I started writing out ads in my own hand every day – regardless of how boring the task, or how tired I was.
I made it a habit to read and re-read (at LEAST 10 times) high ticket products I bought.
And, even more importantly, I stopped worried so much.

Because I just KNEW that by developing my ability to produce (in my case, to sell) everything would come out okay in the wash.

Yes, things would be bumpy and I had setbacks.

But I knew everything would take care of itself in the end.

And guess what?

Now that we're hip deep in an even WORSE recession, I got this bug to pass this life-changing lesson on to you.

To reassure you that, no matter how "hairy" things get, if you hone your ability to produce, you have nothing to worry about.

Your ability to produce is the most valuable skill you can have.

The ultimate asset and investment.

Treat it like a proverbial "money tree" – water it, care for it, and let it GROW – and you'll inoculate yourself (like a vaccine) against all the poop about to hit the fan.

School Refusal and Anxiety in Children

Many parents feel helpless when their child refuses to attend or stay in school. School refusal is an anxiety disorder where your child can feel a real sense of anguish, uneasiness, fear and a sense of danger associated with school. Two to five percent of children will be hindered by this affliction, but it is most common among those aged five, six, ten and eleven. Luckily effective ways of dealing with it exist. Since prevention is usually the best line of defense we will discuss some of the common risk factors. I will also mention a few tips you can use to reverse the situation once it has started.

Personal experiences have an influence on the desire to attend school. Luckily, we can narrow down the most influential environmental factors that have been proven to contribute to this problem: homelessness/poverty, teenage pregnancy, school-violence, lack of connectedness, parental involvement and family variables. These forces do not develop in isolation; they feed off of each other. Poverty can lead to stress; the stress can come from a number of issues like unemployment and inflexible, long work hours. This can have a harmful impact on parental and family involvement. A lack of involvement, especially from the father is also associated with teenage pregnancy. Parent and family involvement helps children become resilient. Resiliency helps them develop the ability to recover from life’s inevitable setbacks. When this is not in place children are less able to take risks and overcome challenges such as violent or unsupportive environments. If a child cannot devise ways of coping with these harsh situations, he or she will naturally avoid them. It can seem like a self-defeating cycle.

Most parents have already worked hard to correct or prevent the influential factors mentioned above. I listed them to make you aware that if these conditions are present, you may have to pay a little more attention to your child’s behaviors. One important consideration is your child’s proneness to feelings of anxiety. Anxiety is at the root of why most children avoid school. Examples of what causes students anxiety are: separation from their parents, bullying and fear of not performing well in school. These negative feelings are often expressed physically through stomach aches, headaches, diarrhea and nausea. In addition, you might notice behaviors such as asking to stay home, disobedience, rigidity, tantrums, seclusion and avoidance. It is important not to minimize or get angry with your child over the symptoms that you see and hear.

This is difficult to do because it is frustrating to see your child behaving in a self-destructive way. In addition dealing with it requires time that parents very frequently had not planned for. In order to make that time effective try to remember some of the most common reasons students give for feeling anxiety over school: bullying, under-performance and separation anxiety. Furthermore, try to remember that admitting anxiety or fears is often considered a weakness and can be embarrassing to many people. Few of us are or were ever comfortable admitting anxiety or victimization. To open the lines of communication it is crucial to offer sincere help, understanding and curiosity for what your child is experiencing. Regardless of how unreasonable an explanation might be to you try to accept it and work to address it. When working with students, I keep in mind that it is extremely difficult to understand and empathize with what others are feeling especially when the source of fear is irrational to us. It is important to remember that functional adults have illogical fears too; many yell, run or scream when they see a water-bug or mouse 1/100000th their weight.

School refusal is an anxiety disorder, and as a result you have to accept that your child’s feelings truly are hindering rational thoughts and behaviors. Determining whether your son or daughter has an anxiety disorder is not your job as a parent. You should carefully observe all behaviors that seem unhealthy to you and communicate with the school regarding absences. If the problem persists for more than four weeks seek professional help from a therapist. The therapist can administer different techniques such as operant conditioning, which involves rewarding, and or exposure therapy. They might also teach relaxation techniques like breathing as well as positive thinking. The therapist can in addition conduct a comprehensive mental evaluation to determine the true cause of the problem. Depending on the therapist’s assessment, the problem could be deemed to be primarily environmental like the causes described earlier or medical.

If the problem seems to be medical, the child may be referred to a psychiatrist. He or she will assess your child further and may introduce pharmacotherapy (drug treatments). Studies have shown pharmacotherapy can be useful when the reason for school refusal is anxiety or depression. However, before taking this crucial step, there are several other tools parents can try. Here are six ideas.

  1. Take morning practice runs weeks before school starts. The hope will be that they will be trained to get up and prepared for school sooner.
  2. Talk to him or her about any fears and feeling they may have towards school. It might help if you talk about your own fears about school and now at work. If you take this approach be careful not to redirect the conversation to yourself.
  3. Help your child connect with others in the school such as teachers and students. They will be an additional source of support outside of the home.
  4. Encourage him or her to participate in extra-curricular activities such as clubs or sports.
  5. Remind your child that other kids are shy too. The shyness is something they can use to connect with other students.
  6. Help them develop friendships by teaching them how to give appropriate compliments regularly. Warn them that good friends do not keep score or tallies of deeds done. Furthermore, remind them that people want to be friends with other people who know when to apologize, forgive and be polite.

These life skills will help your child build connections with others. They will make school a more enjoyable experience, in many cases.

Perhaps most importantly work with your school counselor. The school counselor is trained to provide support in academic, career, college access, and personal/social competencies.He or she should be your liaison to the entire school. Students need to know that adults in a school care, whether or not they attend class and whether they succeed. In addition to emotional support school counselors are prepared with resources to help your child overcome fears of performance and can help him or her improve performance. If the issue is bullying, the counselors will also work with the school’s dean to address disciplinary or safety issues that need to be dealt with.

Parent involvement is probably the biggest tool you have to prevent this problem from ever appearing in the first place. Many of the parents I have worked with want me to give them ideas. Here is a short checklist of things that many successful parents do regularly:

  • Schedule a book reading night at least once a week.
  • Attend parent-teacher conferences or communicate with teachers over the phone or email often.
  • Check homework every day and ask your child to teach you what they learned. Make sure they tell you what they learned on that day not what they already knew.
  • Limit or eliminate television on school nights.
  • Monitor your child’s school attendance and lateness.

You have a great deal of information to consider. Some of you may be single parents or may work two jobs. Others may be working and going to school and still others have other children to worry about or an illness to deal with. School refusal is problematic and an additional stress to parents but it can be corrected if you consider the points in this article. Regardless of your obstacles, children usually turn out well when there is a consistent demonstration of profound tenderness, passion over success, deep affection, and personal attachment from someone in their life. These qualities alone will help your child feel like he or she can conquer the world, and they probably will. Good luck to you, stay in touch.

How to Increase a Man’s Interest in You & Make Him Want You Even More! Follow This Advice Right Now

If you have a guy who already likes you, then that’s great-and congratulations. But if you’re one of the millions who are taking their shot at love and longing to be wanted, then read on:

Compliment him in the sincerest way

Say something nice about how he looks. Notice his shirt and how it looks good on him. Praise him for whatever good deed that he has done to you or to other people. It would definitely boost his confidence.

Always look better each day

Physical appearance is always the first basis of attraction. When you look good, he will become attracted to you more and more each day. Always be conscious of your over all hygiene. Don’t just put on clothes that make you stunning; also be concerned about other details like your teeth or nails. Some guys are very particular about this.

Don’t force him to anything

Don’t push him to do things he’s not accustomed to or let him do the things that he does not want to do. In short, never manipulate him-this is not a good thing to do. It is a man’s tendency to run away when he’s pinned at a corner.

Keep your independence

Don’t depend too much on your man. Do as much as you can independently. Continue to do things that you were doing before you were together. Go out with your friends and keep yourself busy with a hobby and interesting activities.

Never set limitations

Don’t give him ultimatum on what he can and cannot do. Give room for his freedom. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean that you can prevent him from seeing his friends or playing his favorite online games.

Be a good company, or better yet, be the best company

Be fun to be with. Add humor into your conversations. Do crazy things together and don’t be too serious. Try to have fun doing the stuff that he likes. Be excited in watching him play ball with his friends.

Take it slow

Don’t be very excited to take your relationship to the next level. Be patient with him and wait until he’s ready so he will not be pressured by the relationship. Don’t talk about marriage or having children right away, this would really scare him off.

Whatever steps you take to make him miss you more, it’s the way you say or do things that would make the big difference. Being missed by your guy has something to do with how deep his emotions are for you. So when you hear him say he missed you a lot, then it only means that you’re more than a plain girlfriend to him!

The Fascinating History of Basketball

It was the year 1891, on a cold December day, that basketball came into existence. This immensely popular game was invented by James Naismith, a physical education teacher at a YMCA in Springfield, Massachusetts. He created this game for his students.

His pupils loved to play soccer and football, but with winter coming it just was not feasible to play any outdoor sports. Since he wanted all of them to stay in good health and continue to get the exercise they needed, he came up with an indoor game that would keep them moving. His idea led him to hang two peach baskets from balconies at opposite sides of the gym and grab a soccer ball. With that, basketball was born!

Nine players were put on each team, since the total class size was eighteen students. Once the soccer ball hit the gymnasium floor, the game began. The ball was bounced and passed between all the players until one student got the soccer ball into one of the peach baskets. This was the first three points ever made in a basketball game!

Now, this original game did not come without its problems. The most serious was the fact that someone had to climb a ladder every time a basket was made to retrieve the ball. This was an easy problem to solve once they thought about it for a bit: they cut holes in the bottom of the peach baskets! Now the ball could fall through and play could continue without the long pause. Occasionally, the peach baskets were replaced with backboards and a metal hoop.

Basketball now began spreading. It started being played in high schools and colleges. Various rules and limits were created for the game so that teams would not be too big, since at one point a university sent over 100 students out to play at once! With organized play and teams, basketball really took off as a serious sport.

In 1949, basketball went pro with the creation of the National Basketball Association (NBA). Although it only had eight teams to start, this association has grown to include thirty teams and millions of fans. For a brief period there was also the American Basketball Association (ABA). Created in 1967, the ABA folded after less than nine years due to financial problems.

So, as you can see, the popular sport of basketball had a very humble beginning. James Naismith, now dubbed the "Father of Basketball", simply created a game that his students could play out of the cold. Nowadays basketball is one of the most widely played ball game drawing in a broad range of audience and players.

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Private Label Wine

When purchasing private label wine you will sometimes find a real gem and then on the other hand you may find a dud. The popularity of private label wines is growing rapidly. If you are a wine enthusiast, have you considered making your own?

Finding out how to make your wine is the first step. There are a number of online sites devoted to the beginning wine maker, with suggestions for equipment, recipes, types of wine and even wine making kits.

Get the information that you need either online or at your local library and do some reading on the subject.

In practically any major city you will find stores that have wine making equipment and supplies to fit most anyone’s budget, just do some checking in your yellow pages. They most certainly will have wine making books and lists of equipment and supplies that are needed to make your own private label wine.

It may be less expensive to purchase wine making kits, however sometimes the equipment in them isn’t the best. It’s probably better to purchase the individual supplies so that you can see the quality that you are getting. A kit might be a good choice for the first time wine maker that just wants to see if it is something they want to do, you can always add to it later. Wine making kits usually come with all the supplies needed to make your first batch.

Once you have the supplies needed you will need to purchase the grapes. If you happen to be in an area that grows grapes, you can go to the vineyard and choose the grapes you want. If you are not in a grape growing area you will have to get them at your grocers. The store that you purchased your supplies from may know of a local source of grapes. The grapes should be as free of bruises as possible, insect free and clean. Be choosy here and start your wine making with a good product. Also you will want to be sure and remove the grape stems when you process them, they cause a bitter taste to the finished wine.

Wine making may at first seem complicated, but after you have made your first batch or two you will be an old hand. Do some experimenting to make your private label wine to your taste, keep accurate notes on the type of grapes used, the yeast and the amount of sugar used so if it really turns out great you will be able to repeat the process.

When you have produced that great private label wine, with your own label on it, it will make a great gift to family and friends. This may even be the start of your own business or at the least a great hobby.

Different Side Effects of Chemotherapy

Chemotherapy is the treatment used to attack cancer cells, which is available in the form of pills, catheter and injections. Chemotherapy treatment is very effective as drug travels throughout the body and kills cancer cells found wherever.

Drugs used for chemotherapy are chemically designed to target cells that are growing and dividing rapidly, when these drugs reach the cancer cells they hold up their growth. One can go through this treatment at home, in hospital or also in clinic.

The frequency and dose of treatment depends on health, type of drug, body response and stage of cancer. The patient can be treated on daily, weekly, monthly or on off schedule basis.

Although it is true that the chemotherapy treatment is very effective, it produces some side effects. It is an anti cancer drug which can damage normal healthy cells. These side effects can be temporary or permanent.

Following are some common side effect caused by chemotherapy treatment.

  • Fatigue : People have different types of side effects due to chemotherapy. Those side effects include tiredness during treatment while some can live their normal lives during treatment.
  • Nausea and vomiting : This side effect is very commonly occurring during chemotherapy treatment. Use of anti-sickness drugs is the way to control nausea and vomiting. You have to take these drugs under regulation of your doctor only.
  • Mouth sores and ulcers : Some soaring and ulcers occur in the mouth due to some chemotherapy drugs. To avoid this use mouth wash regularly.
  • Hair loss : This is very harmful side effect and is very hard to bear. You can avoid hair loss by covering around the scalp during chemotherapy treatment, which help to stop hair loss to some extent. After treatment hairs will grow back.
  • Susceptibility to infections : Some drugs destroy normal cells including white blood cells, when they are acting on cancer cells. White blood cells fight with infections and these cells are very important. Shortage of WBC weakens immune system of body, which can make you susceptible to infections.
  • Decrease in blood cell count : There is great potential to become weak or anemic during chemotherapy. There are regular blood tests should be done to avoid decrease in blood cell count.