If you’re feeling like one day you woke up and suddenly it was all about anal, you’re not alone. It’s like the vagina has become the boring older sister. She was hot once but now they’re all lusting over the smaller tighter one…
So with all this attention on the rear, the question is, do women enjoy anal sex and what’s in it for you? Thankfully, the answer is yes! Many women love it and even prefer it to vaginal sex with more intense, full body orgasms. So how do you learn how to have anal sex properly and get you some of that?
Firstly it’s not for everyone but if you would like to learn how to have anal sex, understand it’s a process. If you have tried it once, maybe twice before with regrettable results, like a lot of first timers you may not have taken the full necessary measures to prepare the body. Understandably just the thought can lead to a lot of anticipation. But thinking about how to have anal sex for the first time is a lot like considering regular vaginal sex as a virgin. It’s a little scary and a little exciting. You’re expecting a bit of pain and you know it will be awkward but still you trust all the information you have ever received, you know you will eventually enjoy it. So why should anal sex be any different?
How To Enjoy Anal Sex
Start by learning to love and acknowledge your bum. If you’ve never really considered your back passage before, learning about it can be quite liberating. What wonders and mysteries does it hold? Have you have been neglecting an area of your body that is potentially capable of extraordinary sexual experiences?
A good way to begin is by experimenting on you in your own time. This is an incredibly foreign area to many people. You must become familiar with your own body first and comfortable with touching and experimenting with your anus before moving on to a partner.
Start by lubing a finger and gently rub around your anus taking time to explore. Light movements will help to heighten its many nerve endings and should feel pleasurable. Start to apply more pressure and insert your finger. At this point, you will hit your internal sphincter that might be quite a shock. Your likely reaction will be to get your fingers as far away from your bum as possible.
Learning to understand the internal sphincter is essential when learning how to have anal sex. Unlike the external sphincter that you can tighten or relax, the internal sphincter is an involuntary muscle. Its important job is to keep bodily product in that is not ready to be expelled and assist when its time to get it out.
Many people falter with anal sex when they hit the internal sphincter. Because you can’t control it, its normal reaction is to contract and tighten when a finger or something larger is poking at it from the other end. However, it can only tighten for a certain length of time before it tires and loosens on its own. With gentle persistence, usually after about a minute, the muscle will stop contracting and relax. At this point, you should be able to continue with slow pain free insertion.
Over time you will become more accustomed to how this feels. Small vibrators or a dildo are excellent tools to help you practice and gradually get you used to the sensation of larger objects. It is important to start out small than boldly try with a penis straight away. The anus has the ability to stretch, however as you progress with toys, beware. The bum really is like the black hole. The body will without mercy suck objects in like a vacuum. Ensure your toy of choice has a flat end to prevent any mishaps that would require surgical removal.
How To Have Anal Sex With A Partner
When moving on to include your partner, understandably, the ewh factor is very real and hygiene preparation is a must. Your body cannot be at its most relaxed when your mind is not at ease. Enjoy an erotic shower with your partner beforehand and start the foreplay by cleaning each others bits until they are squeaky clean.
It also goes without saying that a pre sex bowel movement is essential. When it’s not possible to go on command, over the counter enemas are a popular and effective way to ensure your peace of mind.
Now that you are clean, your body then needs to be worked to the point where you can’t wait for anal penetration to begin. As well as regular foreplay it is best to also participate in Anallingus. If you don’t feel comfortable with the idea of your partners tongue up your bum, you may need a rethink. You are preparing for a large erect penis to enter a very tight downward chute. The sensation of a loving partner tickling and teasing, licking and blowing is a very sensible way to prepare your whole body and mind for the bigger and better things to come.
Before attempting penetration you must firstly apply lubricant liberally all over his penis. Also have him insert it right up in to your anus using his fingers. Doggy style is usually perceived as the easiest way to begin, however your muscles are far more relaxed in the missionary position. As well as allowing for easier insertion, missionary position is also beneficial for beginners due to its intimate nature. You can continue to kiss, and talk to each other directly, guiding him to continue further or stop when you need a break.
When you are ready, breathe out and ‘push out’ as he begins to push in. You may feel a stretch or a pinch. Insertion is the hardest part of the process but it should never be forced. When you are ready it will be easier to build momentum once his penis gets past a certain point, usually a couple of inches past the shaft.
Continue slowly, always talking to your partner. As he moves in further you may have the feeling that you need to go to the toilet. If you have done everything to prepare beforehand, this is only a natural reflex. Your body is used to pushing objects out the other way. Stop for a moment until the urge passes.
If you are finding it painful it is important to stop and retrace your steps. Your body probably wasn’t prepared as much as it could have been. Practice and good preparation should lead to a pain free experience.
Finally, it’s unlikely you experienced an orgasm the first, or first few times you had vaginal sex and anal sex is no different. Many women report that while learning how to have anal sex it’s the sense of erotica that is different to vaginal sex, that keeps them persisting and practicing to reach the ultimate in climax.